dbm Battles the Pink Robots

And he’s currently growing more interested in finishing a certain PS3 game than caring that “it’d be tragic if those evil robots win.” (Flaming Lips)

For true, I am writing a post about the fact the vast majority of equity trades in US markets are, in fact, carried out by robots. Why will I probably be the only one to call them robots, while any other source is likely to describe them as algorithms?

For the same reason I call myself a person and not a brain. That is, the autonomous entities, like many other robots, use algorithms to think. In what I consider stupid, a lot of machines are created with artificial neural networks. That is, they are designed to be analagous to the human mind. Which would be great if we valued thinking machines because they’re as slow as us and procrastinate and take motherfucking lunch breaks.

But no uh-uh. Companies and industry publications, etc, have already begun issuing robot-specific versions of their publications. Why? The Buy button gets hit a few microseconds faster and makes some shaved monkeys a few extra million dollars.

But back robots!

I wanted to say I’m trying. Just not hard enough.