WHY JESUS HATES YOU!

  1. How old are you? READ IT ALREADY! Dick!
  2. Praying in public is to impress people, not me, who thinks you’re a sad hypocrite.
  3. And rather boring.
  4. Maybe New-X would… God — Jesus! — Am I talking to myself? A part of myself? PARDON THE IDIOT CHILD WE HATE YOU BECAUSE IT’S BEEN MILLENNIA SINCE YOUVE BURNED US UP ANIMAL INNARDS, DICK! JESUS — Dad! — SON, I’M — No Dad… The fixation and the use of “sweet savor” like 500 times…
  5. You got rid of Purgatory and I can’t send HIM to Hell so — just let him crash at your place tonight. ….Jesus — Jesus! — Damn it, Dad, can’t we make this thing corporeal?
  6. NO! — Only dolphins have souls, and they’re not afraid of ghosts!
  7. Oh yeah. Dolphins go to Heaven. You sick things just vanish but I swear to God — THE FUCK YOU DO, BABY JESUS! — Dad! — YOU’LL ALWAYS–
  8. Because you’re quick to anger, to annoyance, to impatience, to every opposite of every virtue…
  9. CHAR SOME FUCKING OFFAL ALREADY!
  10. I’ll have a Classic X. BTW, if I’d died for your sins I’d be a fucking moron — SON, I’M BAD COP! — Mother of — Jesus! Give your Mo– MOM! …Glad you’re here but — my God — WHAT THE FUCK, ‘MANNUEL! — Sorry Dad — But is that your body, Mom? You werre Asssumed like I was?
  11. And married or some twisted shit to Mormons!
  12. Hate you. Love any dolphin soooo much more.